A young girl who was writing a paper for school came to her father and asked, "Dad, what is the difference between anger and exasperation?"

The father replied, "It is mostly a matter of degree. Let me show you what I mean."
With that the father went to the telephone and dialed a number at random. To the man who answered the phone, he said, "Hello, is Melvin there?"
The man answered, "There is no one living here named Melvin. Why don`t you learn to look up numbers before you dial?".
"See," said the father to his daughter. "That man was not a bit happy with our call. He was probably very busy with something and we annoyed him. Now watch...."
The father dialed the number again. "Hello, is Melvin there?"asked the father.
"Now look here!" came the heated reply. "You just called this number and I told you that there is no Melvin here! You`ve got lot of guts calling again!" The receiver slammed down hard.
The father turned to his daughter and said, "You see, that was anger. Now I`ll show you what exasperation means."
He dialed the same number, and when a violent voice roared, "Hello!"
The father calmly said, "Hello, this is Melvin. Have there been any calls for me?"
 

The restaurant where a man took his two kids for a meal was crowded with fans watching a sporting event on television...A harried waitress took their order, but more than half an hour passed with no sign of her return. The man was trying to keep his kids from becoming restless when suddenly shouts of victory came from the bar.
"Hey!" commented his young son, "It sounds like someone just got their food!"

Why are Egyptian Children always confused?
Because after death, their DADDY becomes a MUMMY.

Q: What time is it when most people go to the dentist?
A: Tooth-Hurty!